Monday, February 20, 2012

Thankful

Wow.

That's honestly the only word I know that can describe how this weekend was for me. Scratch that - how this entire school year has been for me.

But let's start at the beginning.

I didn't grow up in church like most of my friends did. I went when I was very little and then when I was around three, for various reasons my parents stopped going. I picked back up again when I was in sixth grade when I started going to church with my friend Casee. From then on I would either go with her or talk my grandmother into coming over and taking me on Sunday mornings. Still, I didn't know a great deal about God, but the desire was there. I explained it to my husband this weekend as me having this huge empty void in my life and knowing that I had the capacity to love someone so much and it ate at me every single night as I went to bed. As a young girl I stupidly thought that feeling was meant for a boyfriend that I didn't have yet. But one night at a youth rally, I was saved and that feeling was never there again. God had made a home in my heart and I've forever been changed.

In high school, I drove myself to youth group and learned a lot more about the bible and about God. Then in college my relationship with God was even more solidified and I began dating a godly man who would later become my husband. Through a journey of trying out several area churches, we eventually ended up at First Baptist Arlington. That was probably one of the best decisions of our life.

We joined choir and a young marrieds sunday school class and began to build relationships in both groups. I have had mentors from both of those groups who helped shape me into a better wife and mother, and I know they will be people I will look up to for the rest of my life.

Then last year Cody and I felt the call to work with the youth - and that's when everything changed.

It was funny the first time we talked about it with each other because it seemed that God had been placing it on both of our hearts for a very long time, but we weren't talking to each other about it. We prayed more about it and decided to take the plunge last January when the new school semester started. Kurt (our youth minister) told us to just hang out in each department until we felt comfortable. We started with seniors because we had some friends that were already teacher there, but when we were introduced the director said, "This is Cody and Heather Bush and they will be with us for the rest of the year."

Okay - seniors it was.

I loved that group. There were so many young leaders and so many kids that loved God. They were awesome. We didn't teach yet, but helped out with events and just got to love on those kids and I am so glad we were where we were. We helped out at youth camp which was amazing too, but then the next school year was coming up and we were asked to teach.

This is when I started getting nervous. I can teach five and six year olds in my sleep. I'm good at it and I know it. Seventeen and eighteen year olds? That was a different story. I just felt as if I didn't have the talent to teach that age. I was scared to death the first Sunday we taught them. But then they started talking. :)

Now, I am not going to say that Cody and I haven't had some lessons that bombed because we have...at least in my eyes they have. But those kids have changed me. I love them plain and simple. I find myself each day at work, in my car, at home praying for them and their future. Some of them I even think of as little sisters now. And the funny thing is when I think I'm going to teach them something on Sundays, I go away being taught so much more than I would have thought.

Enter in this past weekend - Wakeup Weekend.

As I said before - wow. I saw God move in those kids' lives like I've never seen. I saw raw and powerful worship. I saw walls being broken down and students give control back to God. I was even blessed to see one of the seniors begin his life with Christ. God. Was. Moving. I have never been so humbled and honored to be in the presence of this group.

And if I were to be honest with myself, I've learned so much more about God this past year than I have in my entire life. He has changed my heart about so many things and made me uncomfortable but with good reasons. I know God put these seniors in my life to help me and I cannot thank Him enough for them. I am so proud of them and who they are becoming in Him.

But I also know May is coming and I'm not sure how I'm going to handle that. I get attached to my first grade students each year and hate to see them go, but with this group it's so much more. But for now, all I know is that I am so thankful for what God is doing in their lives and mine.

Our God is so good!!!